The Sudden Curve

Muppets Bohemian Rhapsody

(original version)

posted by Tom Novak who thinks this might be the greatest video/song combo of all time ...

Ka-Whoosh!!

  The best weapon of all time is of course the flame throwe. Repairman Jack used one to burn up the Rakosha.

There are flame thrower kits available for car exhausts, but what sort of retard would use one for that?

Rea kits should be sold. Hell, who knows when you'll run across a Rakoshi? Or a zombie?

Posted by Bob Wallace, whose brain is working away on how to build one.

The Greatest Song Ever

Posted by Bob Wallace, who first heard these guys on the Bob and Tom Show.

Blood, Beasts, Breasts -- and Weapons!

  We at The Sudden Curve are experts on all things fun -- what Joe Bob Briggs called Blood, Beasts and Breasts. We are also experts on what goes along with those things --Weapons!

One of the best of those weapons are of course knives. And some of the best knives are made by Spyderco.

Repairman Jack uses a Spyderco, as does, of all people, Hannibal Lector.

Personally, I think these things are based on a dinosaur's tooth -- probably a Velocirapter.

Posted Bob Wallace, who is all for velociraptors and their teeth.

Tim Hawkins : The Government Can

When you tell the truth you better make them laugh or they'll kill you ...

posted by Tom Novak who shamelessly lifted this video from Wally Conger.

The Best Cologne Ever

Posted by Bob Wallace, who laid in a 50-gallon drum of this stuff in high school, because he knows the chicks dig a good-smellin' man.

The Best of Batman

I used to watch this all the time as a kid. I was so little I didn't know it was a parody.

Posted by Bob Wallace, who every day goes "DADADADADDA!! BATMAN!!

Nathan Fillion -- Repairman Jack

  Now that I think about it, Nathan Fillion would make a better Repairman Jack than Hugh Jackman.

To me he looks more like what Repairman Jack would look like than Jackman.

Only one movie needs to be made -- "The Tomb."

Posted by Bob Wallace, who still has nightmares about the Rakoshi.

Duane Eddy -- the Guitar Man

My mother had a couple of .45s of this guy. Too bad they're gone. They might be worth something. But then again, maybe not.

Posted by Bob Wallace, who can't sing or dance or nothing.

Loreena McKennitt....Ahhhh...

Posted by Bob Wallace, who never hears her on the radio.

Jamaican Blue Mountain Coffee....ummmmmm

 The best coffee I've tasted is Jamaican Blue Mountain coffee. I have to order online because I've never found it in any store.

It is, of course, grown in the Blue Mountains of Jamaica, and it is darn expensive. But if you like coffee, then it's worth it.

First coffee I ever tasted that had no bitterness at all.

Coffee and cigars...don't need much more in life than that. Well, Edgar Rice Burroughs. And John D. MacDonald. And F. Paul Wilson, And Nat King Cole. And Loreena McKennit.

Posted by Bob Wallace, who lives on coffee and tea and cigars.

Mr Cole won't rock and roll ( but he could if he wanted to ... )

The Essential Cool Stuff theme song

posted by Tom DADDY-O Novak, from the coffee house

Guns as Equalizers

  Pistols, in the 19th Century, were called “equalizers” because they made the tiniest woman equal to the biggest man. I’m not even going to say I’m a believer, because I don’t “believe” it’s true, no more than I believe 2+2=4. It just is true.

I have known three women who were murdered. I did not know them personally. One was strangled by a serial killer a few weeks after I left my job and she was hired. She was a young little woman, and for that matter, the guy who killed her wasn’t that big. I could have taken him, which is why these guys kill the weaker, such as women.

The other two were sisters, and I did meet their mother. They were raped and thrown off of a bridge by four teenagers.

In each case, if these women would have had a pistol, or even a knife, they probably would have survived. Even a two-shot, .22 derringer might have saved their lives, just with the threat of it, nothing else.

I once wrote an article about the two sisters, and made a silent bet with myself that at least one imbecile would tell me young people should not carry guns. I responded, “So you’re saying it’s okay that these women were raped and murdered, then?” and got no response.

I am reminded of the classical definition of a liberal: someone who would rather see a woman raped and strangled with her own panty-hose rather than defend herself with a handgun.

I think it should be a law that everyone has to carry a concealed handgun. Sure, there’d be an adjustment period in which those genetically and character-deficient were eliminated, but in the long-run (meaning a few weeks) society would be much more peaceful.

Posted by Bob Wallace, who sez, an armed society is a polite society.

Now Who Would Play Repairman Jack?

I've read that Mark Wahlberg has been considered for the role (get me a bowl so I can throw up) but the first actor who comes to mind is Hugh Jackman.

Wilson said that Repairman Jack was a guy no one would notice, which is not true of Jackman, but in a movie the actor has to have presence, otherwise no one will see it.

Jackman actually does have kind of bland good looks, so might not be a bad choice. And he's physical enough to play the role.

Posted by Bob Wallace, who is just too way good-looking to play the role.

Repairman Jack and his Semmerling .45

  The pistol that Repairman Jack carried in an ankle holster was a Semmerling .45. I've never seen one, not even in a gun store.

They are expensive pistols, about $700, and not many were made.

They have very few moving parts, which means they are extra-reliable, but the weird thing is that they are not auto-loaders. You have to pull the slide after every shot, and then push it foward to load the round. Jack once had to use his teeth his one hand was chaine to a pole.

It's the smallest .45 in the world and carries five rounds.

Posted by Bob Wallace, who actually believes in flamethrowers.

How Woman Can Understand Men

 

Posted by Bob Wallace, who sez, they forgot the beer.

A Cartoon I Did After 9-11

 
Posted by Bob Wallae, who still thinks this is funny.

Repairmen Jack: Slaughter of the Sheep

I am a fan of F. Paul Wilson’s “Repairman Jack” novels.

Wilson s clearly a libertarian, and so is Repairman Jack.

Jack lives “off the grid,” has no identity, and “fixes” things the bumblers in government cannot or won’t fix. And he does something that everyone should do: carry a concealed handgun. In his case, most of the time, it’s a Semmerling in an ankle holster.

In the last novel of Wilson’s I read – “Hosts” – the action starts right at the beginning. Jack is riding a subway when some lunatic decides to slaughter dozens of people with his two 9mms, both with silencers. Shades of Colin Ferguson!

The first words out of Jack’s mouth are: “Doesn’t anyone have a goddamn gun?”

Of course not! They’re sheep, and sheep believe what the government tells them – guns are Bad Things! Not one person in that subway car has a gun, and so the shooter opens up with his two semi-automatics and people start falling left and right.

Jack, however, pulls his Semmerling, shoots the lunatic three times – the last time right in the eyeball – and puts a fourth round into the guy’s boombox, which is playing awful music. Think of all the money he saved for a trial for this guy if he had only been wounded!

And Jack uses frangibles, so there’s no possibility of exit wounds and ricochets. I love anyone who knows their guns and ammo. (He buys both from the “Isher Weapons Shop,” and if you don’t know what “Isher” means, shame on you.)

The Jack turns into the cowering sheeple (the ones still alive) and yells at them: “Why me? Why do I have to save your sorry asses? I don’t know you, I don’t care about you. I want nothing to do with you, so why me? Why did I get stuck with it?”

Because not one person in that subway car had a pistol, that’s why.

“And this creep knew that! He knew he’d be dealing with a herd of human sheep! Losers! You make me sick – all of you!”

And then he disappears out the door.

It is a good thing for academics to write their heavy tomes, full of statistics, showing the more guns, the less crime; the less guns, the more crime. But that’s telling, really. But there’s a big difference between telling and showing.

Stories don't tell; they show. That’s one of the first things I learned in journalism class: “show, don’t tell.” Stories are what touch people, not statistics. That’s why those few pages in Wilson's novels are worth several books of statistical analysis.

I consider the Repairman Jack novels to be horror, and like all horror, it’s about Order pushing back the Chaos. That’s what Jack does: he pushes back the Chaos. And that means Justice…which is not surprisingly one of the Four Cardinal Virtues.

One description of Justice that I am familiar with is “the virtue whereby we give to each person what is due to him, and we do this consistently, promptly and pleasurably.” This is also what Jack does.

Oh, would I love to see “Hosts” made into a movie. For that matter, I’d love to see any of his Repairman Jack novels made into movies.

Jack, you’re my hero.

Posted by Bob Wallace, who wants nothing to do with no shark-headed monsters.

I Did This One Years Ago, Too

 
Posted by Bob Wallace, who likes cats and dogs but isn't too sure about mouses.

A Cartoon I Did Years Ago

 
Posted by Bob Wallace, who despises politicians.