The only thing I need to knock a velociraptor's eyeball right out of his scaly head is a Red Ryder BB gun, the kind Ralphie used to bump off the bad guys threatening his family in A Christmas Story. Okay, so maybe the villains were Ralphie's fantasy, but the Red Ryder BB gun is the only thing anyone needs to take out any number of dinosaurs. T-Rex? Bah! Child's play for this little baby. Who needs one of those rotary guns what like Neo used in The Matrix? If he would have had this beauty, those Agents wouldn't have stood a chance! All dinosaurs tremble at the very mention of the dreaded Red Ryder!
(~ note to all editors @ large .... Hey! Don't forget on your way to Raptor Island to bring along your Saunders' Wrist Rockets for back-up and remember to pack some lawn darts. We'll teach those punk-ass velociraptors what happens if they mess with Burroughs' Tradition baby-boomers. Oh, and don't forget a few packs of these. )
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